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Now you are sorted out and prepared to move on, we can now go to what you should and should not expect.
Expect and show for each other love, peace, honesty, trust, kindness, reliability, patients, understanding, protection, truth and comfort. Keep no record of past wrongs. Expect to sort out every problem. How you do this is by communicating. It is so easy. One at a time, listen to what the other has to say then the other one can speak. If you have a problem with not admitting that you were wrong then the relationship may not be at ease. If you can listen and accept the truth with an open mind, your relationship will flow as calm as a still river. Whoever is right should not be arrogant in victory. There is not one person on earth who is always right. Just leave it at that and don’t gloat.
Now, the things you should not expect.

A big house, holidays every month, 2 BMW’s, everything to be how you want it and nothing else, to be happy that you are having an affair, everything that shops have to sell, constant sport on the TV to act as your remedy for your happiness......

The problem when some people get married is that they expect too much. And what some couples expect are just material things. Put your brakes on for just a moment. When you expect something and don’t get it, you become disappointed. How high the level of expectation is, the greater disappointment you will feel.
Let’s say you have just married a millionaire. You are expecting expensive or a lot of things aren’t you? One day the stock market crashes and the millionaire loses everything. Even if the millionaire promised to give you this and that, there will be absolutely no way you will get it now. What do you do? Divorce, because you will be upset? If you do get a divorce in this situation, then it is obvious that you married the money and not the person. Remember those words “Till DEATH do us part,” not, “When you lose your money we must surely part as soon as possible for it is very embarrassing for me for I want everything I expected to have.”

No no no. As I said before, high expectations lead to certain disappointment in this case. Firstly, only expect the things I mentioned before. These are emotional and spiritual foundations which should stand firm as the strength of the relationship. Anything else like a big house, BMW, etc. should only be seen as added bonuses for both of you. You may not always have a big house or an expensive car. You could lose all your belongings in a fire. What is most important is that you have each other. You can rebuild everything again and even make life twice as good as before.
The marriage union is the beginning of a great life between two people. Whatever you say to each other or how you treat each other is like a drawn out plan of how your life will be built. If all what you do and say brings happiness to the marriage then the wall of love will be built higher and stronger. If what is being said and done is negative, like constant arguing, not talking things through, unnecessary mood swings, etc. then the building of the marriage may cease. If the building does not continue, after a while, a bulldozer or a divorce may knock it down. It may be reduced to rubble leaving the two of you to pick up the pieces and go and build with someone else somewhere else.
Alternatively, you can both start again with each other, but why let it reach this stage when you could have been happy in the first place? If the building stops, find out what the problem is, like how I mentioned before, and then continue building.
Never have an affair. You must realize that the one who you have married is your partner, lover and your friend. You don’t need to go out of the relationship to look for these people. If your lives seem to become routine then why not try something different. You could try different food, go on a holiday or dress up and have some private fun with each other. You could even go to a restaurant that you have never been to before or simply order a pizza and eat ice cream and relax all evening.
Don’t give the excuse of “I just can’t find the time.” I didn’t want to go down this road but I have heard many times when a partner of someone had died, they wished that they had made more time for their partner. It is a case of “You don’t know what you have got until it’s gone,” so make time. You and your partner are worth sharing good times.
I must mention this. For ladies who are reading this, I suggest if your man asks you “What is wrong” don’t say, “You should know.” A man could guess all night and never get the right answer. It also makes you even more upset because he has not got the right answer after all those guesses. Simply just tell him what the problem is when he asks the first time. Its much quicker and you can be at ease sooner rather than later.

Men, try to avoid giving your wife the silent treatment. Women may not understand the reason for that quiet moment you need. Simply explain that you need to just chill for a while and you will speak with her in a moment. Ladies, don’t force the issue, just give him some time to clear his thoughts.
For both the man and the woman, a compliment or appreciation for something for either of you goes a long way. Its nice to have something good said to you when you have made an effort. It does not cost anything and it keeps the happiness flowing nicely.

I have reached the end of this short message for those who are contemplating marriage or are already married. I hope this has helped you. You can search out what will improve your relationship for yourself as you know your partner a lot more. (Get to know your partner more).